What Authority Does a Husband Have over His Wife?
Authority of Counsel vs. Authority of Command
A husband’s authority is what I would characterize as an authority of counsel, not an authority of command. In both kinds of authority, there is the right to make commands, and the person under is called to submit. So wives are called to submit in the same way children are called to submit.But the difference between authority of counsel and authority of command is that there’s no enforcement mechanism, no discipline mechanism for a husband.So think about what the enforcement mechanism is for a parent. It’s the power of the rod. You need to go to bed because I’m your dad and I said you need to do it now.Scan your mind’s eye through all the Scripture and ask yourself, Is there any place where husbands are given a discipline enforcement mechanism? Long, awkward silence. No! There’s not. You don’t get to force. You don’t get to demand and say, Now, or else.It’s not a fear-driven form of authority. And a parent’s authority, if need be, on occasion, does allow for use of an enforcement mechanism and the threat of it to lead a child towards wisdom. But a husband’s authority works in a different way. Here’s why it’s important to distinguish those two kinds of authority: it dramatically impacts the nature and the how of such authority.With a husband’s authority, I’m to live with my wife in an understanding way. What’s the goal of a husband’s authority? It’s to win her towards oneness.What’s the goal of a husband’s authority? It’s to win her towards oneness.